Humans clobber comet with space probe!

[Scott Gardener]

http://deepimpact.jpl.nasa.gov/home/index.html

After centuries of inspiring humans to fears of war, disasters, and cataclysmic doom, comets finally get their share.

For centuries, people have viewed comets with fear and trepidation, seeing "swords in the sky" as heralds of horrific bloodshed. In more contemporary times, the experiences with comets have only gotten worse. In 1910, Halley's Comet made a close pass to Earth, sparking sales of gas masks and "comet pills." Writer Mark Twain even said something along the lines of, "I came in with Halley's Comet; I'll go out with Halley's Comet."

Fear of comets have only intensified, as scientific evidence throughout the twentieth century that a large meteor, which is kind of like a comet, only not as flashy, was responsible for the extinction of the dinosaurs. Fears of another cataclysm climaxed at the turn of the millennium, when Shoemaker-Levy 9 taunted humans by crashing into Jupiter. Though the benevolent gas giant tore the comet to pieces and withstood the blow for Earth, taunts came from the Oort cloud, screaming, "you're next!" The reaction sparked the release of the feature films That One With Bruce Willis and The Other Comet Movie.

Now, humans have finally found the strength of will to fight back against this cosmic menace. NASA and JPL, when asked, had this to say: "This one is for T. rex!"

[Lupin]

So the score is now what? Earh: 1 Comets: <Areallyhugenumber>?

[Silverfang]

So the score is now what? Earth: 1 Comets: <Areallyhugenumber>?

Earth: 1 , Comets: 3 (from what i remember)

[Koshaw]

Aww poor comet What did they ever do to us wahhh hehehehhehe.

[Lupin]

Aww poor comet What did they ever do to us wahhh hehehehhehe.

They made the Heaven's gate people kill themselves, and started a bunch of stupid news coverage.

[Fenrir]

I remember reading somewhere that a huge meateor was so close to hitting Earth and wiping out everything, but it was like 10 thousand miles from us, and nobody new about it until 3 days after it flew by! it was like in November 1989.

[Lupin]

I think that's happened a couple of times.

[Fenrir]

Ya it probably has something like once every two hundred years, but what's scary is that they didn't know until the 3 days after it had past. They should have seen it coming. And it was extremely close interms of space distenses.

[Lupin]

Ya it probably has something like once every two hundred years, but what's scary is that they didn't know until the 3 days after it had past. They should have seen it coming. And it was extremely close interms of space distenses.

Well, these rocks tend to be small, and space is really big, and we can't look everywhere at once.

[Fenrir]

I wasn't talking about the little ones I was talking about the really big ones like 3 miles long and bigger, not the little tiny ones. heres my comparison would you see a knat coming at you and care, but if you saw a baseball you atleast should care.

[Lupin]

I wasn't talking about the little ones I was talking about the really big ones like 3 miles long and bigger, not the little tiny ones. heres my comparison would you see a knat coming at you and care, but if you saw a baseball you atleast should care.

In space 3 miles wide *is* nothing. The Earth is 7,900 miles in diameter and we're small. The largest planet in the solar system, Jupiter, is 10 times that, and the sun is 110 times that.
Space is really really really big.

[Fenrir]

your right you win the thing is the meteor was really close compared to space's really really bigness

[Figarou]

I wasn't talking about the little ones I was talking about the really big ones like 3 miles long and bigger, not the little tiny ones. heres my comparison would you see a knat coming at you and care, but if you saw a baseball you atleast should care.

In space 3 miles wide *is* nothing. The Earth is 7,900 miles in diameter and we're small. The largest planet in the solar system, Jupiter, is 10 times that, and the sun is 110 times that.
Space is really really really big.

I feel like a microorganism.

[Shadow Wulf]

you are figarou, we all are

[Lupin]

Space is really really really big.

I feel like a microorganism.

Yeah, I try not to think about it.

[Scott Gardener]

Heaven's Gate is simply the latest reminder that every time a comet passes by, we lose a few people.

If aliens wanted to wipe out humanity, they wouldn't need to land on the planet and risk that bacteria thing, or the plot device of a computer virus and a well-placed tactical nuke. What they could do instead is hurl comets by the planet. They wouldn't have to hit it--just pass them by. We'd off ourselves for them.

[Lupin]

Heaven's Gate is simply the latest reminder that every time a comet passes by, we lose a few people.

If aliens wanted to wipe out humanity, they wouldn't need to land on the planet and risk that bacteria thing, or the plot device of a computer virus and a well-placed tactical nuke. What they could do instead is hurl comets by the planet. They wouldn't have to hit it--just pass them by. We'd off ourselves for them.

That's not a half bad idea. We should do that anyway.

[WolvenOne]

You know, I hear Nasa's already been sued by a woman that's claimed that doing this has thrown off her Horescope.

[Figarou]

You know, I hear Nasa's already been sued by a woman that's claimed that doing this has thrown off her Horescope.

So thats why my fortune cookies never seem to work!!

[Kzinistzerg]

fig, that's because you got the foturecookies that say "yuo shoiuldn't have eaten the cookie"

[Vilkacis]

*opens up a fortune cookie and reads:*

Do not read this under penalty of law.
Violators will be prosecuted.
(Penal Code sec. 2.3.2 (II.a.))

Uh, oh

-- Vilkacis

[Figarou]

*opens up a fortune cookie and reads:*

Do not read this under penalty of law.
Violators will be prosecuted.
(Penal Code sec. 2.3.2 (II.a.))

Uh, oh

-- Vilkacis

Hmmmm.......


*removes the "Do not remove" tag from mattress*


Uh, oh

[Lupin]

*opens up a fortune cookie and reads:*

Do not read this under penalty of law.
Violators will be prosecuted.
(Penal Code sec. 2.3.2 (II.a.))

Uh, oh

-- Vilkacis

Hmmmm.......


*removes the "Do not remove" tag from mattress*


Uh, oh

*watches as a SWAT team surrounds Vilkacis and Figarou*


Hmm, so that's what happens when you remove the tag.

[Figarou]

*watches as a SWAT team surrounds Vilkacis and Figarou*


Hmm, so that's what happens when you remove the tag.

They will never take me alive!!!


<--------*assumes the duckie tossing position*

[Shadow Wulf]

SWAT: everyone get down hes got a duckie and not afraid to use it!!!

*SWAT closes in on Figarou*
SWAT: Cmon ser, you dont want to throw that rubber duckie do you. you have nowhere to run the building is completly surrounded.
SWAT:NOW
*Every SWAT member jumps on Figarou and Velkacis